Chapter 29 - Shiny, happy fits of rage

"So how long before your hubby comes back?" Lanie enquired, taking a sip of her coffee.
"Two weeks," Kate replied despondently.
"Why didn't just go with him?"
Kate turned her gaze to the cup in her hands, gathering her thoughts. "That was the plan, well to join him at least for a few weeks. But with Lizzy starting the teething process, it would have been impossible. I can't hop on planes and jet off all around the country with a sick kid. It's bad enough at home."
Lanie watched her goddaughter with a tender smile. She looked at her friend again and had to suppress an amused chuckle from slipping out. Kate was comically miserable, pouting like an unhappy five-year old.
Yep, Writer Boy has definitely rubbed off on her.
"Well, she looks fine now." Both women turned to watch the miniature one who was busy sucking on a building block, drooling all over the eduational toy in the process.
It was adorable.
"Yeah, she is. She was sick the whole week, though."
Lanie turned back to Kate. "How did you cope?"
Kate sighed, keeping a protective eye on her daughter. "Slept little and soothed a lot. She was crying so much." She smiled when Lizzy let out an excited squeal, spit bubbles foaming around her small mouth. "I think she also misses her daddy."
She sighed and watched Lizzy crawl around in the playpen amongst her fluffy friends. She idly wondered about when her daughter was going to drag her to little-girl tea parties or tug on her hand to come and tuck her in while Daddy read a bedtime story or beg Mommy to push her higher on the swings. Her lips tilted upward as the images flashed through her mind. She couldn't wait to have tickle-giggle-fits with her little girl on lazy mornings, to set an extra plate for the imaginary friend, to find her staggering around in her mother's six-inch heels, to hide with her while Daddy searched for them, to fight off the monsters under her bed, to sing with her to the unborn baby brother or sis-
Whoa. Where did that come from?
"Girl, why didn't you call me?" Lanie asked, snapping Kate out of her musings.
She drew her eyes back to Lanie, who was looking at her with a raised eyebrow, and shrugged. "You have enough on your plate with work and wedding plans..." A teasing smirk slowly curved her lips upward. "Bridezilla."
Indignation and annoyance flashed across Lanie's features. "I am not a Bridezilla!" She watched her smirking friend and huffed out a breath, a reluctant smile slowly forming on her lips. "Well, even if I were - which I'm not - can you blame me with a mother like mine and a mother-in-law like Mama Esposito?"
Kate chuckled and shook her head. "I know you're not. I'm just teasing, Lane. So... how are the plans coming along?"
"Which plans? The wedding ones or the ones pertaining to the disappearance of a few select people?" The ME shot back dryly.
The two women broke out in laughter and a few moments later, the cute, miniature one clutching a teddy bear joined them with a joyful shriek and bubbly giggling.
"Oh you are just too damn cute!" Lanie bent down and plucked the giggling nine month-old out of her playpen. "I think I'm gonna steal you." Lizzy was smiling, clutching at her godmother's cheeks. "What do you say, Cupcake? You wanna come live with your Aunt Lanie?" Lizzy squealed and wriggled in Lanie's grasp before sneezing cutely causing both mother and godmother to laugh.
"I don't think her mother or father would like that very much, Lane. Even if she is absolutely gaga about you." Kate had her chin propped up in her hand, watching them with a wide grin. Lanie looked at her friend and smiled while Lizzy bounced up and down in her lap.
"No, I s'ppose not... She's just too darn precious. I know I've said this before, but you and Writer Boy seriously make the most adorable babies."
Kate's grin widened. "Well, I'm sure your and Esposito's babies are gonna be just as adorable." She paused for a moment. "You know? You two should start on one as soon as possible. Lizzy needs a playmate," she said casually. Lanie froze and slowly turned towards her friend . Kate fought the amused grin teasing her lips and arched an eyebrow.
It was a rare sight - a frazzled and rattled Lanie Parish. It was also a very, very amusing sight. Especially if you were the best friend of the woman in question; the best friend who had to suffer through many awkward comments and intrusive questions.
Just a little payback.
"Uh, uhmm, so we- we were talking about wedding plans."

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Two hours later and after tucking Baby Castle in...
"Ah, Mrs. Castle. Did you call to tell me a bedtime story?"
Kate laughed and checked her watch. "Honey, it's barely eight in Chicago."
He shrugged and grinned. "So? The time of day - or night - never stopped us before." The innuendo wasn't lost on her.
"Shut up, Castle." He didn't have to see to know she was rolling her eyes.
"Oh, it's Castle now again, huh? That's not what you scream-"
"Rick," she warned.
He smirked. "Yes Dear?"
"If you still want those sexy and lacy photos of moi, you better behave."
His smile faltered as carnal images flashed through his mind. "Yes Dear," he breathed. After recovering he spoke again. "Why haven't you called me earlier? Besides wanting to talk to you, I've been going out of my mind with boredom."
"Hence the hundreds of banal text messages you sent me," she commented dryly.
"Hey, they weren't all banal!" He could practically hear her arched eyebrow. "Okay, so maybe telling you about Crotch Scratcher Guy was. But didn't I also tell you that I love and miss you very, very much?"
She softened and bit her lower lip. "You did, every time... Ditto, by the way."
"Love you too, Babe," Rick said quietly. Her heart skipped a beat. "So, why didn't you relieve my boredom?"
And there was the whiny six-year old again...
"I had a date."
"A date, huh? Pray tell, who is keeping you company while your husband is hundreds of miles away? I'm jealous by the way."
She rolled her eyes, picking up her near-empty glass of wine and walking over to the couch. "Just Lanie. She came by earlier for some R&R. And to spoil our daugther. I swear, if I hadn't intervened, she would have taken Lizzy home."
He laughed softly. "Is my baby girl already sleeping?"
Instinctively, she glanced up the stairs. "Yeah. I just put her to bed a few minutes ago."
He sighed. "Oh. And? What is she up to?"
Kate let out that adorable little laugh that he loved - the baby of a chuckle and a giggle.
"Well, she's crawling everywhere and I'm running after her the whole time. Thank God the house is child proofed."
He laughed, the rich sound rumbling into her being. She didn't have see to know that his eyes were crinkling in delight. "I'd love to see that."
"I have her on video - I'll send it to you. She's so fast! You'de be so proud, Daddy. And the way she moves her little body? It's the cutest thing ever." Her voice sounded like the silver lining of a dark cloud, the rainbow after the rain, the sun rising in the East.
His heart ached.
"God, I miss you." The words were a breathless, yearning exhale.
She returned a sigh, placed her glass on the table and turned to lay down on the couch. "We miss you too... But it's almost over, just two weeks left. I'm counting the minutes!" She was grinning, expecting him to be doing the same.
His expression sobered.
Oh, right. That.
The silence stretched out for a few moments. Rick scrubbed a hand over his face and sat down on the edge of his bed.
He hated hotel beds. They didn't come with her in them.
"Uh, yeah. About that." Rick rubbed the back of his neck and pursed his lips.
Kate immediately tensed and sat up. "Rick?"
Honesty was the best policy. "Well, with the book sales doing so well they're thinking about extending the tour for another two weeks."
Silence.
Never a good sign.
"What?" Her voice was dangerously low. He could imagine her gritting her teeth.
Goodbye melody and brightness. Hello stormy darkness.
He flinched. "They want me to do another two weeks."
"And? Are you?" Her tone now was sharp, strained.
Uh-oh. She was pissed.
He rubbed his forehead and sighed. "I don't want to-"
"-But," she interrupted tersely. He could practically see her folding her arms defensively.
"But my hands are tied. It's in my contract."
She let out a harsh, humourless laugh. "Of course it is."
"Kate..."
She stood up and plucked the now empty glass off the table and walked over to the kitchen. "No, it's fine." It wasn't. "If Gina says jump, you ask how high."
Rick wearily dropped his head into his hand, pressing his palm against his forehead. "Kate-"
"No, no. It's fine. I get it. There's nothing we can do now, is there?"
"I can fight and try to get out of it or... you could always join me," he said quietly, hopefully after a while.
Without hesitation: "No."
Not unexpected. He sighed wearily. "Why not? I miss you."
She ignored the last part. "I'm not taking our daughter to your fangirl-orgies," Kate spat.
Wow. She was really pissed.
He gritted his teeth and stood up, feeling his own temper wavering. "Kate, you know I didn't want to do this damn book tour in the first place!"
She shook her head, anger bubbling into her voice. "And yet you are."
"Please, I don't want to argue about this again, okay?" His tone was firm, resolute, frustrated. "Book tours are part of the deal. You know that. I don't like it any more than you do."
She shook her head while putting her glass in the sink. "Oh come on, Rick! Don't give me that crap. You've been on tour for a month already!" She was furious and needed to lash out. "Let's face it - you like, no, love the attention. You crave it. You're addicted to it. You absolutely love it when your adoring fans scream your name. Just don't, for god's sake, drag me or my daughter into it!"
Silence. Complete and utter silence.
Uh-oh.
She crossed a line, caused a crack, drew blood.
Eventually when he spoke, his voice was eerily quiet and even. The calm before the storm. "Remember to send me that video of Lizzy before you go to bed."
Shit.
Kate closed her eyes, regret and remorse crashing over her like a tidal wave. "Rick-"
"I'll call you tomorrow." He sounded tired.
Before she could reply, apologize, tell him she loved him, the line was dead.
Shit, shit, shit.
Kate briefly closed her eyes and lowered the phone from her ear. She pondered about hitting the redial button, but refrained from doing so. He would need time to cool off; if she called him back now, he would explode.
And then things could get very nasty.
As if on cue and as if sensing her parents' turmoil, Lizzy's sobs sounded out through the baby monitor. Kate felt her own eyes welling up and angrily swiped at them before getting up.
"I'm coming baby girl," she called out, her voice unsteady with regret and longing. "Mommy's coming."

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She had called him again, twice. He stubbornly didn't answer. But when she sent him the video, he forgave her everything.
He watched as his baby girl wriggled and crawled around enthusiastically, exclaiming with little shrieks of delight. He smiled broadly at the sight. He could hear Kate's dazzling laughter as she followed their fast-moving daughter around. At one point she turned the camera on herself, a magnificent, proud smile adorning her face. She was utterly beautiful. She turned the camera towards Lizzy and squatted down, the nine-month old looking up at her mother with fascinated blue eyes. Lizzy gave another squeal of delight and Kate laughed, scooping her daughter up into her lap. After few moments of jostling the camera, mother and daughter came into view. Happy and beautiful.
"Say hi to Daddy, baby girl," Kate said, pressing her cheek against her daughter's head while waving Lizzy's small, plump arm. She lifted her gaze to the camera and smiled, eyes sparkling brilliantly.
His breath hitched.
"We love you and miss you, Daddy. Come home soon."
The image froze and his eyes burned. Without hesitation, he pressed play again.
He couldn't wait to see this for himself.
And in a week's time, he would.

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So be kind

And don't lose your mind

Just remember that I'm your baby

Take me for what I am

Who I was meant to be

Title is from the cute Juno song "Anyone else but you" and the lyrics at the end is from the Rent song, "Take me or leave me."